Living in the Past
by GothicAngel-sama
Summary: Can music help Kiba to get over the past, or will it hang over his head and drive him mad with time? First song fic though I own NONE of them.


**I'm back again with my first song fic! Four songs will appear and I own NONE of them. They belong to the respective artists. **

**In order of apperence is: 1. Seven Spanish Angels- Ray Charles. 2. Hello Darlin'- Conway Twitty. 3. I Can Love You Like That- John Michel Mongonery. 4. He Stopped Loving Her Today- George Jones.**

**So please enjoy ^..^**

Living in the Past

A cool breeze blows through the village breaking the heat wave that is common for Kohana summers. Leaves in the trees above shake and shimmer, sometimes releasing from the branch it was on and instead riding the wind to another place. One it's never been before.

Sighing, I tilt my head back to look at the clear blue sky. I close my eyes, taking in a deep breath as I do. My thoughts wonder to my crush. How beautiful she is. Her gentle laugh, her pale opal eyes, her long blue hair that drops down to her waist, the fact that she's currently dating my best friend. I opened my eyes and look down the dirt path I'm walking. I hear a whine from the ground behind me. I turn to see my faithful puppy, Akamaru, looking up at me.

"It's ok Aka. I was just thinking a little," I told him as I placed my guitar case beside me and knelt to scratch behind his ears. I scooped him up and place him on my head under my hood. Retrieving my guitar case from the floor, I continued on my way through the village to the park I like to play guitar in.

I found my usual bench that's off to the side of the main playground. I've learned it's the best place to play to get tips from the locals, but for me this place holds a much deeper meaning than just free cash. As Akamaru jumps off my head, I put my case on the floor and take off my black jacket to reveal a simple black muscle shirt and the silver dog tags that Naruto got me last year for my birthday. Draping my jacket over the back of the bench, I sit down and take my guitar out of the case and started to hum a basic melody. I close my eyes and take a deep relaxing breath as I focus on the sounds surrounding me. The wind blowing through my shaggy brown hair, birds chirping in the trees, the swings squeaking and children giggling as they play. I focus on Aka's steady breathing and the constant thump of my heart.

I start strumming the chords for an old country song by Ray Charles. So far, in the time that I've had this old guitar, I've have only wrote one song. I'm not very good at putting words to the melodies, so I tend to do covers of songs that I like.

"_He looked down into her brown eyes and said, 'Say a prayer for me.' She threw her arms around him and whispered,' God will keep us free.' They could hear the riders coming. He said,' This is my last fight. If they take me back to Texas, they won't take me back alive'"_

My eyes drifted closed as I lost myself in the song. I took a deep breath as goose bumps covered my tan skin, due to the haunting melody, despite the warm sun blaring down on me.

"_There were seven Spanish angels at the altar of the sun. They were praying for the lover in the valley of the gun. When the battle stopped and the smoke cleared, there was thunder from the throne and seven Spanish angels took another angel home."_

I opened my eyes to see a small girl, about 7 or 8, in a light blue sundress standing there staring at me with wide baby blue eyes. I smiled at the girl and patted the bench next to me, inviting her to sit with me. With a wide smile she walked around my case and sat next to me, her tiny feet dangling off the edge as I started the next verse.

"_She reached down and picked the gun up that lay smoking in his hand. She said, 'Father please forgive me, I can't make it without my man.' She knew the gun was empty and she knew she couldn't win, but her final prayers were answered when the rifles fired again."_

I looked down to the girl beside me to find that Akamaru had woken up from his nap and had climbed into the girls lap. I looked away from the girl and pup when a hollow _thunk_ came from inside my guitar case. I nodded my thanks to the passing couple and winked at a pretty brunette to my right as I finished the song.

"_There were seven Spanish angels at the altar of the sun. They were praying for the lover in the valley of the gun. When the battle stopped and the smoke cleared, there was thunder from the throne and seven Spanish angels took another angel home."_

A thunder of applause came from the group of about 20 people that had gathered in front of me. More change was thrown in and praises were called out. I stood up and took a bow and thanked everyone. I felt a tug on my pant leg, so I look down to see the tiny blonde motioning for me to bend down. When I got down to her height, she threw her little arms around my neck in a hug, which I returned, earning a chorus of soft gasps at how cute it was. When she let go she ran to her waiting guardian standing on the edge of the crowd. With a small wave back to me she took her offered hand and skipped away.

I looked back to the crowd and caught sight of an angel. Her long midnight hair slightly parted pink lips, and her endless opal eyes. My chest tightened when she gave me a small sad smile. Smiling back, I readjusted my guitar strap and sat down with my head hung low.

"This next song is dedicated for to the girl I love, but whom I have hurt very bad in the past." I took a deep breath and lifted my head to meet the eyes of my beautiful teammate, Hinata Hyuga.

"_Hello darling, nice to see you. It's been a long time you're just as lovely as you used to be. How's your new love? Are you happy?"_

She and Shino Aburame left about six months ago for a mission in Mist. Before they left, Hinata had told me of their relationship, and I had over reacted. I said hurtful things to her and I regretted it all. I couldn't stop thinking about that night. Since I had loved her since we were genin, it was quite the low blow.

"_Hope you're doing fine, just to know it means so much to me. What's that darling? How am I doing? Guess I'm doing alright, except I can't sleep and I cry all till dawn. What I'm trying to say is I love you and I miss you and I'm so sorry that I did you wrong."_

She hung her head and buried her face in her hands causing her hair to fall around her in a shimmering curtain that sways with the wind. Her shoulders shook with silent sobs.

"_Look up darling, let me kiss you just for old time sake. Let me hold you in my arms just one more time. Thank you darling. May God bless you and may each step you take bring you close to the things you seek to find." _

She smiles sweetly and wipes her eyes as she turns her back to and starts to walk away. She glows in the afternoon sun. She truly is an angel.

"_Goodbye darling gotta go now. Gotta try to find a way to lose these mem'ries of a love so warm and true and if you should ever find it in your heart to forgive me, come back darling, I'll be waiting for you."_

She stopped and looked over her shoulder at me. With a sad smile she shook her head and disappeared in a flurry of leaves.

More money rained into my case and everyone clapped. A few people had even started to cry. I once again thanked everyone and went around my case to talk to people. When I was asked where I got my muse, I told them that I never wrote my own songs, I only played covers. One older lady asked me where I had gotten my guitar and how I learned to play. I told her that I got it from a gentleman in Suna and I learned how to play after I bought a few how-to-books. She smiled and took my hands in her frail ones. "Young man, you sound like your just about my grandmother's age." She laughed at the look I gave her and explained it to me. "What I mean by that is that you have been through a lot in your life. Just by the way you sing and the emotion you put into it I can tell. They say the eyes are windows to the soul and your soul is filled with so much anguish." With that she walked away. I stared after her and thought about what she said.

An old soul…

A soft bark brought me back to reality. I checked my watch that read 3:25. I stood up on the bench and whistled to get everyone's attention. "Ok, everyone," I called to those who had gathered around me. "I wanted to thank everyone who took the time to come out here to listen and to everyone who donated money. I'm going to get lunch and run a few errands, but you can expect me back bout 6:30 if you'd like to hear more. Thank you." I bowed, put my guitar back in the case and called to Aka- who was playing with a butterfly a few feet behind the bench- and started on my walk home, wondering what to sing to night.

When I got home, I took out my guitar and counted the money that I had earned.

It came out to about 500 yen which I added to the 2000 yen I had saved up from missions and the other times I've played in the park. After I changed into a pair of shorts I made my way back down stairs to get some lunch. On the kithen table I found a note from my mom it read:

"_Hana and I both got sent on an overnight mission, so try not to wreck the house and rememeber to do your chores. We'll be back by lunch time tomorrow_."

I went to the fridge for the things needed to make a sandwich and within five minutes I had a sandwich fit for Kami herself. Grabbing a bottle of water I made my way to the living room and sat down to eat.

I started to think about today. That simple bench I sit at every time I go to the park to play was the spot I had last seen Hinata and when I told her how I felt.

'_You're an old soul…_'

The words the old woman said start swirling around in my mind. I think about seeing Hanta again, about the last time I saw her, and how I came town this worn old guitar.

Team 8 (Hinata, Shino, Kureni-sensei, Akamaru and myself) were on our way to our respective homes after reporting to Lady Tsunade about an escort mission to the Land of Tea when I asked Hinata if she would like to hang out with me the next day. She blushed and played with her hair nervously. When she agreed, I told her that I would meet her in front of the Hyuga complex at one the next day. We eventually reached the complex and after saying good night, I did a dead sprint all the way back to the Inuzaka complex, bursting with energy. I went to sleep with a smile on my face.

The next day I woke up at about ten and took a quick shower. After I dried off enough, I threw on a blood red t-shirt a pair of cargo pants and my usual sandals. I tied my Leaf headband to my left thigh and went in search of a picnic blanket and basket. I found the blanket at the top of the hallway linen closet and the basket in the back of the pantry. After double checking for my money and calling to my mom that I would be going out, I headed to the market place with Akamaru at my heels.

I bought some fruit and a few rice balls. I stopped by the bakery for some fresh cinnamon rolls that Hinata loves and at the dango shop. Whistling an upbeat tune, I made my way to the Hyuga complex to find Hinata wearing a lavender t-shirt and a pair of black pants with her hair braided watching a little lady bug crawl on the grass beside her.

I called her name and walked over to help her up. Offering my hand, I told her what I had planned and we set off to the fountain in the park to have lunch. After we ate, we ended up sparring and then playing tag with Aka till it got dark.

We found a quite bench to sit at and we gazed at the stars. Finally, I got up the courage to tell her how I felt. I turned to face her, grabbed her hands in mine, looked into her eyes, and leaned into kiss her. It didn't last long because she pushed me away.

With tears in her eyes, she told me of hers' and Shino's relationship and that in a few days they would be leaving on a six month mission to Mist. She explained that they have been together for a month and that's when I blew up. How could I not have noticed my best friend and my crush were dating? I yelled at her because she knew how I felt and yet she's still with the bug freak. Did all those years of not so subtle hints, all the teasing and flirting mean nothing to her? Every time I gave her a complement I meant every word and every 'I love you' was a small confession. I called her a tramp and a tease. I told her that I didn't care about what happened to her or Shino and that I never wanted to see either of them again. I stormed off to the training grounds before she could say anything to try to stop me.

When I made it to the training grounds, my eyes were blurred with tears of anger. I let out what sounded like the desperate wail of a dying animal. I grabbed a kunai that I had brought to cut the fruit and started to lung at the trees around me, stabbing and slashing at them. I dropped the kunai and started to focus chakra into my bare hand and punched the tree trunks until my knuckles started to bleed. I stayed there all night letting my anger out on the nature surrounding me. By early morning all my anger was gone. I dropped to the ground and started to cry. I couldn't remember the last time I had cried like this. I cried for hours and after a while, everything went dark.

When I woke up, I was in a plain white room that smelt like cleaning solution. I heard three voices by the door and looked up to find my sister, Hana, my mother, and Lady Tsunade staring back at me. I asked where I was and Hana explained to me that I had been in the hospital for a week because, being the idiot I am, I drained a lot of my chakra and would've died if Akamaru hadn't found her in time for me to be brought here. Tsunade told me that if I had pushed myself any harder I would've died.

When she told me that I almost died, I didn't feel anything. Most people would've been terrified and would promise to be more careful, but me, my only thought was why didn't they just let me? I deserve it and I have nothing to live for anymore. I hurt the one girl I love and I'll never be able to undo that, so what's the point anymore?

I was released the next day and was lectured on pacing myself and that I would need a few days to fully recover from my ordeal. I went through life on auto-pilot. I ate, but I didn't taste, I slept, but I didn't rest. Mom and Hana talked to me and I responded, but I didn't pay attention to the words. I was an empty shell of what I used to be.

I went on like that for about three months until on an escort mission to Suna I met an old beggar sitting on one of the benches playing guitar.

I had about twenty minutes till I had to meet up with my team, so I stopped to listen to him play. When he finished his song and looked up to me, I asked him where he learned to play. He told me to have a seat, asked me what was troubling me. After he heard my sad tale, he answered my question.

He told me that the guitar was his brother's and that he was taught how to play when he was about 22. His brother had committed suicide when he was 30 and in his suicide note left the guitar to his baby brother. It was the last thing he had left of him. He told me about his first wife. She was the daughter of the local baker. Hair like flames and eyes like emeralds, she was friendly and very outgoing. They married and she became pregnant. She miscarried due to stress and five years later she died of cancer.

His second wife was the daughter of a traveling merchant. She would travel with her father and when she was old enough, decided to stay in one village instead of traveling so much. They dated for two years until she finally said accepted his proposal and they married in the spring. They had no children, but were quite happy together. They were married for 30 years until she cheated on him. He tried to kill himself, but it didn't work. He told me of the night he went home to find her in bed with another man. Saying nothing, he ran out of the house and into the desert. He ran for until night fell. He then stopped and took the knife he always had with him and slashed his wrists, succeeding in missing a major artery causing him to black out. He woke up in the hospital with his ex-wife sitting by his bed with his guitar. His last words to her were," I'll love you till I die." He told me that he then turned to drinking and sold everything he owned but the clothes on his back and his brother's guitar. He's been playing on the streets for change and he didn't mind it all that much. He played his guitar every day for his brother and for her, hoping that one day, she'd come back.

When he finished his story, he looked to me and said," Here, I want you to have this guitar. It's gotten me through some tough times and maybe it'll do the same for you. My only request is that the first song you write with it, you come back to this spot and play it for me."

After that, I looked at life so much differently. I started to feel again and I reminded myself to find joy even in the simplest things because one day, it could all come to an end.

Checking the clock, I run back upstairs to grab my case and head back to the park to find a large crowded around my bench. Laughing, I made my way through the people sat down and started to strum after I freed my guitar.

"_They read you Cinderella. You hoped it would come true, that one day your Prince Charming would come, rescue you. You like romantic movies and you never will forget the way you felt when Romeo kissed Juliet. All this time you've been waiting you don't have to wait no more."_

Couples got up to dance. I saw Hinata standing in the tree line watching me. Shino came up behind her and wrapped his arms around his slim waist. She leant back into his hold with her eyes closed and he leaned down to kiss her forehead.

"_I can love you like that. I would make you my world. Move Heaven and Earth if you were my girl. I would give you my heart, be all that you need. Show you you're everything that's precious to me. If you give me the chance I can love you like that. I never make a promise I don't intend to keep, so when I say forever, forever is what I mean. I'm no Casanova bit I swear this much is true, I'll be holding nothing back when it comes to you. Your dream of love that's everlasting, well baby open your eyes." _

They started to sway together. I felt my heart sink because she is truly happy with him. Across the field beyond the dancing couples Hinata opened her eyes and smiles at the bug-nin. She unwrapped his arms from her waist, took his hand in hers and started walking towards me.

"_I can love you like that. I would make you my world. Move Heaven and Earth if you were my girl. I would give you my heart, be all that you need. Show you you're everything that's precious to me. If you give me the chance I can love you like that."_

The crowd applauded me as I bowed and took off my guitar. Placing it behind me on the bench, I walked around my case to meet Hinata as she let go of Shino's hand and wrapped her in a hug. Her slightly shorter frame fit perfectly in mine as I bowed my head and rested my cheek in her midnight locks, breathing in the subtle smell of vanilla and lavender.

"Hinata," my voice was shaking. "I'm so sorry for everything that I said to you that night." I closed my eyes as tears threatened to spill. "I never meant any of those things that I said, I was just angry because I've loved you for so long, but you're with Shino. Please, Hinata, please forgive me." We stood there for what felt like an eternity.

"Kiba, I do forgive you, but I will never be I love with you. You will always be my friend and my teammate, but nothing more. What I feel for you is different from what I feel for Shino. He's my soul mate. Please understand." Her voice was just loud enough for only us to hear.

I gave her one last squeeze before I let her go. "Thank you," I smiled at her and she smiled in return. I walked back over to my guitar and put it on.

"Ok everyone, this song is one I wrote for a friend of mine who passed awhile back. I wrote this song myself, so it might not be that great."

"_He said, 'I'll love you till I die.' She said,' you'll forget in time.' As the years went slowly by, she still preyed upon her mind._

I let the music flow through me. I looked up to see the crowd dancing again. The moon was gone but the stars were bright and the street lights were creating a soft heavenly glow.

"_He kept her picture on his wall. Went half crazy now and then, he stilled loved her through it all, hoping she'd come back again."_

I started thinking about the old man and the story he told me. I thought about the old and what she said to me this morning. An old soul, huh? I guess they're right. I smiled.

"_Kept some letters by his bed dated 1962. He had underlined in red every single 'I love you.'"_

I thought back to the last time I seen him. I found him at the same bench we had met. He was all dressed up with nowhere to go. When I asked him why, he told me that it was his time and I played the small part of the song I had finished.

"_I went to see him just today, oh but I didn't see no tears. All dressed up to go nowhere. First time I've seen him smile in years."_

Tears welled in my eyes as I thought of the day I learned of his passing. I went to pay my respects and I played him this finished song. I looked up to see Hinata watching me with a worried expression.

"_He stopped loving her today. They placed a wreath upon his door and soon they'll some to take him away. He stopped loving her today"_

I closed my eyes and lost myself in the melody as I finished the song. It was moments like this that I felt infinite.

"_You know she came to see him one last time, oh and we all wondered if she would. And it kept running through my mind, 'this time he's over her for good.'_ _He stopped loving her today. They placed a wreath upon his door and soon they'll some to take him away. He stopped loving her today"_

When I opened my eyes, I was surrounded by a large crowd. Everyone was talking at once telling me how great the song was. I tuned out, focusing instead on the couple in the trees. Hinata smiled and Shino just nodded. I smiled and returned the nod. Together they turned around and disappeared out of sight.

As I walk home, I think about the last few months and what I've been through. How broken I was and how that old man really helped me. I smiled to myself. If Hinata and Shino can find true love, I can too.

Maybe I can start with that brunette in the little red sundress who gave me her number…


End file.
